So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
Please know that I fully expect you to help me steal a bed if I have a bad breakup.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
did i just pee glitter
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