actually, I'm a sock model
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Seriously, dude... You knows its bad when you gag on her nipple.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
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