He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
Thanksgiving. This year's theme: I am thankful that I still have a liver.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
