I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I found my laptop, credit card, and a bottle of Morgan all on the counter this morning. I'm scared to see what gets delivered to my house this week.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I passed out in my bed, but woke up on the dog bed,with no pants, snuggling with toilet paper and a bottle of softsoap. Ive hit a new low.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
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