does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
Is it ironic that our divorce court is a block from where we had our reception? Or is it just sad? Alanis has confused my understanding of irony.
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Randomize