There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck does a person bruise an armpit? I swear to god, I get the lamest drunk injuries.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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