I wanna bring you to show and tell
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i already hear my dad disowning me
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
