the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
Ripping out my IUD in Dave and busters bathroom
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Hate my fucking roommates.... Seriously, who the FUCK peels potatoes in the bathroom sink?!
Randomize
