He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
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