It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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