garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Best friends brother. Beat that.
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
