have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Me too. I'd like to spend all next summer high and drunk and riding ponies and boys.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
no. you can't hotbox the world.
You just kept taking about baking cornbread and doing your physics. Even drunk assed random you is a better student than me.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
Randomize
