Did you ever notice that cashews look like fetuses?
Is it weird if i grunt like Tim Taylor when im having sex AND grilling steaks??
farters have to be the big spoon...
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hanging on that rope, lady gaga looks exactly like a used tampon
all i know is that if they can hide that much blood in her outfit, they definitely could have hid a penis
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
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