My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Are we DOING anything for lunch...if sex is involved, let's just be straight forward and stop wasting the first half hour! We just need to get to the point
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
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