there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally need to be slapped with another cock just to notice it.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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