hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
You asked for 4 things: your phone, your wallet, your keys and your denture. I stopped asking questions.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Randomize
