I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
Have you ever tried running while drinking 151?
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
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