I was passed out on the couch, she literally cut my boxers off with a 8" chef's knife and had her way with me.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Hahahaaa There's this one girl crying hysterically and wrapped around (i believe) her ex's leg. He's trying to shake her off without spilling his beer. This is fucking priceless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
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