To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
time to smoke my breakfast
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i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I just slipped on ice and peed on my pea coat. There's a pun there but I'm too sad to make it
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
Randomize