Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
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