Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Ok so I'm not gonna ignore the fact that you had sex on a frat basement floor and spent the last 4 years wondering how you got HPV
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
Randomize
