This cookie i'm eating tastes like pizza. It was so worth contacting my sister for pot.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I just put lube in Matt's bellybutton. He looks unhappy.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
