the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Nobody cheats on THIS.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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