PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I had a dream that I had to take a breathalyzer but then it turned out to be a bong....why can't that be real life?
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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