happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
LOVE ME MORE THAN PIZZA CAN
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
