Sponge bath it is.
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
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