I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I just accidently sent my poop smells like vodka to 27 people in my phone book
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
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