If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
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We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
You said your face felt like it was made out out of boxes and kept asking me to give you a bath.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Oh boom. You're officially Dr Phil. I need to have sex that I actually remember participating in.
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I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
We figured you were on something when you said that your nipples couldn't hear the music.
I don't think I'm ever gonna need a boyfriend again. I have a body pillow, a vibrator, and I'm strong enough to open my own jars.
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
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