I just wanna be some guy's midlife crisis
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
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I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
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It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
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