Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
It's always a relief to be able to look at some one, and remind yourself that there IS some one who gets laid less then yourself.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
Hindsight is 20/20. Or a bladder infection.
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
I felt I lost my designated buddy on a field trip when you wandered off to get high with strangers.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
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