Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
i get of class at 4. it takes me 17 minutes to walk home and 3 to load a bowl. thank you, priority registration.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
Randomize
