It wasn't awkward until he started humming the Rocky theme song in the middle of fucking
I woke up naked by my window. blinds open. smiley face drawn on my window.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead