Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
What have I told you about trying to use Jesus as your wingman?!
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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