im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Did we literally take a cab across the street
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
I HAD TO TAKE A SHOT OF JAGER AND SOME REDBULL JUST TO SEE IF IT’LL MAKE MY MOUTH FEEL BETTER
Randomize
