hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I think I'm finally maturing. I'm happy he found someone. Good for him. I sincerely hope she doesn't choke on his tiny penis.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I feel like I beer bonged a ton of asbestos
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize