The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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