If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
It's always a surprise to see what songs I shazamed and downloaded last night while we were drunk at the bar.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
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