i just wanna soil my oats bro
who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Randomize
