I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
She swung at the pinata with crutches
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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