That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I like to melt taper candles in my wine bottles the next day, it makes my drinking trophies more classy, and makes me look like less of an alcoholic.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
I have post one night stand depression
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