No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
successfully started a charcoal grill with 2 shots of everclear and some aluminum foil. i never wanna leave here
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
Just heard a 15 minute program on the radio about how cases of gonorrhea in the throat and rectum are skyrocketing in the US. Almost crashed laughing so hard.
Sorry, who is this??
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
