my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
Randomize