You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
