OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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