someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
OK, but next time I'd like to be present for our make-up sex.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
When you can't finish your jumbo margarita and figure pouring it into a to go box will suffice... Midnight snack?
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Randomize
