I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Dude. Muppets take manhattan on netflix instant. Pass my midterm or relive my childhood? Tough decision.
I understand Curling. That high.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
Randomize
