so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
This random guy asked me if I had downs. I was like up yours! And I got out of his car.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
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