i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I woke up this morning to find my closet lacking 98% of my clothes and a text from my male roommate saying your dresses squeeze my genitals
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
