Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Disregard any previous text from the past 12 hours. Except for the one about scoring a strike while drunk bowling. Remember that one.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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