I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
I just gift wrapped bread.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
i came on her dog
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
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