I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
27 People Confess Their Proudest Fap
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
29 Unspoken Rules Of “Bro Code”
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.